Okay, Now Listen

Okay, Meet Our Mamas (with Elizabeth Okwirry and Shaila Scott)

Episode Notes

On this episode, we've got a mama takeover! Our moms join us to check in about motherhood and the expectations they had for us growing up. 

Then, we challenge our mamas to some trivia questions to see just how well they know their daughters. Plus, it's time to find out if Scottie's lack of knowledge of white people really does come from her mama, so we put Ms. Scott to the test!

Lastly, we wrap up the show by giving some words of appreciation and gratitude to our favorite ladies. 

You can follow Sylvia's mom, Elizabeth Okwirry, @lifewithlizanne on Instagram and learn more about her life coaching at lifewithlizanne.com.

You can follow Scottie's mom, Shaila Scott, @shailakiss on Instagram and check out her organization Sisterly Kiss at sisterlykiss.com

Episode Transcription

Okay, Now Listen Season 2 Episode 8 Transcript


 

[Music In]


 

Miss Shaila:  Hello, everybody. You're listening to Okay, Now Listen, a bi weekly show where we chat about what's on our mind, what we're bingeing and what's blowing up our timeline. I'm Shaila Scott and the mother of media personality, content creator, music enthusiast and wing connoisseur, Scottie Beam.


 

Miss Liz: And I'm Elizabeth Okwirry, the mother of culture writer, post producer and lover of Beyonce. Sylvia Obell. [laughter].


 

[Music Out]


 

Scottie: Oh my god!


 

Sylvia: Our mamas are here y'all. If you couldn't tell. They here and already taking over the show. I mean, what -- do they need us this week, Scottie? I'm not sure.


 

Scottie: I mean, they obviously not at all, because the way my mom just just took me out, blew me out of the water. I start doing the intro like that. Cus that's crazy.


 

Sylvia: It's that radio voice you can't really like -- you can't teach that. It's like, I was like we were right here on WBLS, honey. I get it. I love it.


 

Scottie: Yes. Is born with it. She's born with it. Well, hi, moms.


 

Scottie: We're so happy to have you here on our show, Okay, Now Listen, I've been meaning to do this because Miss Liz -- first of all, I got to find out about Sylvia. I need to have a deeper understanding of my good sis. I talk to my sis almost every day. But, you know, finding out a little bit more truth from you.


 

Sylvia: Truth.


 

Scottie: Is what we need. You know what I'm saying.


 

Miss Liz: [Crosstalk] Alright.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] When she said truth, like I feel violated.


 

Miss Liz: [Crosstalk] I'm here for it. I'm here for it.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] The honesty, the depth. Okay?


 

Sylvia: Okay, yes. And same for you Ms. Shaila. Because, you know, Scottie especially have been putting out a lot of she's been blaming a lot of things like, well I don't know, because the way I grew up this or the way I grew up that. And I said, we need Ms. Shaila on here so she can defend herself because --[laughter].


 

Miss Shaila: That's right.


 

Sylvia: And we're here to know the truth.


 

Miss Shaila: When I hear these stories, I'm like huh?


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Please --.


 

Miss Shaila:  I can't remember any of that but okay.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] It's a shame.


 

Miss Shaila: [Crosstalk] We're going to the bottom of that.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] We're doing that. Absolutely. But yes, we want to start though by doing a little check in, that's always our first segment. And since you guys are here, we thought it would be nice to do overall check in as mothers. How you guys feel about where me and Scottie are now in our lives? And how did it - if at all, it matched up with any expectations you had when we were born? You know, they talk a lot about like when you're born, you had these dreams or whatever for your child, and then you kind of have to adjust to what there are. And we're kind of curious to know, like, does it measure up? Was there a time where you were thinking like, oh, no, I don't know how it's going to go and it worked out well? Or did you always have faith? Like tell us what you were thinking?


 

Miss Liz: Huh. I must say, I must say my baby was always curious from when she was younger. I always head in the books. She started reading chapter books in kindergarten and, and hell, she took off a whole nother world. And she just was eating those books up and her and my favorite thing was always sitting in Barnes and Noble and staying there for hours and just chillin with the books.


 

Scottie: Oh my gosh!


 

Miss Liz: But Sylvia has always aspired to go high. And the higher she goes, the higher she wants to go. She's star -- star -- What is it? The sky's the limit. She's fearless and free. And one of the most important things in her life is she believes in God and with God, you can do all things. So she knows -- that's her favorite Bible line, and I could do all things through Christ. And so she just -- so loved that she has God on her side, she's at the top. So I just -- God continues to exceed my expectations with Sylvia. I you, know, I see her here and I'm like, oh, thank you, God, this is great. And then the next thing I know, she's somewhere else. And I'm like, wow. So really, I'm in awe of my own child. I'm just like, thank you, God. I continue to pray for her daily, just knowing that, you know, the sky's the limit. I'm just so proud of her, so. So proud.


 

Sylvia: Oooh!


 

Miss Shaila:  Yeah. Same here. Ditto. I -- you know, when I was pregnant with Deanii I was at VLS and I used to put the headphones on my stomach because I played -- I would sit in for the Quiet Storm and I would play a lot of slow music. So it was soothing, I thought, to put the headphones on my stomach. And I had no idea that she would come to love music as much as she did. And I think it started in the womb not only because I was in the studio every single day of my life during my pregnancy up until I gave birth to her. But as time went on and seeing how she gravitated to music, music really was our books because during the weekend we were cleaning up, it was music. There was really not a part of our lives that wasn't infused with music. And watching her grow. Now, Deanii would always be full of surprises because Deanii never wanted to be on the radio. I would say, come on and talk with me. Let's talk about this. "But I don't want to be on the radio. I don't want to ever want to talk. And I don't want to do radio!" [laughter] And so when she told me, Mom, I think I want to be on the air, I'm like, huh? Wow, why? You never wanted to do this? So she was always full of surprises. One big surprise was the fact that she went to college and she really wasn't into going to school. And I had no idea. And she was telling me, you know, I'm doing okay. I'm struggling in this, I'm struggling with that. But then I come to find out she just wasn't doing well at all and we had to take her on out of there. So I really didn't know what to expect with Deanii. And then boom, God had another surprise for me, and that was to teach me that you don't need to go to college to be a success. And Deanni taught me that. You know, I went to college because -- I wanted to be in broadcasting from high school. And I knew I didn't need a degree to get into broadcasting. But I went because my mother wanted me to go and look in her eyes just said, I need you to go for me, you know, made me want to go. Deanii taught me that not everybody's life is that way. She doesn't have to go to school for me to see that she can be a success. And honey, when she stepped out stage every single time, I was shocked in awe. And I still am. I always say that Deanii is like watching the best movie ever.


 

Sylvia: Awww.


 

Miss Shaila:  Because I never know what's going to happen next. She's super exceeded my expectations. You know, I'm not going to say that I wasn't very disappointed when she came out of school. Matter of fact, I sent her godmother down to Atlanta to get her. [laughter] Because I felt like I was going to kill her.


 

Scottie: And I lived with my godmother [laughter] for a little bit because she was going to kill me.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] She ain't want to see you. She ain't wanna see you.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] She ain't wanna look.


 

Miss Shaila:  Calm down. But even in that moment, it taught me a lot. You know, being separated from her for a minute made me think, okay, now what do we do? Where do we go? But Deanii, although she didn't have a plan, she still still seemed to have a vision.


 

Scottie: Oh mom. I did want to talk about before we moved on, I know, Sylvia, you're the first born. And I am also the first born biologically. I also have an older sister who my mom took in, who is my cousin, but she is my sister. I wanted to know if there were any expectations. Are fears that they had when first becoming a mother, what advice would you give about motherhood, especially like first motherhood?


 

Miss Shaila:  I think for me the fears were planted because once again I was in the industry that for me didn't have a whole lot of mothers. But in fact, when I got pregnant, they were like, look around you. How many women do you see are mothers? You know, they're trying to climb up this career ladder and it's going to slow you down. It may even stop you in your tracks. So the fears were planted. You know, it was the love of my mom who raised me. My great aunt raised me not without the help of my mother, but my great aunt was very prominent in my raising. And she would say to me, you know, you can do this. You just need now the village to step in. And my mentor would say to me that, you might have made it hard on yourself, but it's not going to stop you if you don't want it to you. If you want this, you can have it. It's just going to be harder to get it now. So that meant taking Deanni into the studio, putting her on the floor. I remember, you remember those playpens that put together the polls and --.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Yes!


 

Miss Shaila:  And I would take that playpen into the studio -- was too big for the studio, the studio was that small. [laughter] So I couldn't put together the playpen. I -- we'd just have to put a blanket on the floor and put her on the floor and do my shift. And all of that helped me to see that, okay, I was afraid, they said it couldn't be done, but I'm proving them wrong. And it's, you know, it's a step by step process. It wasn't something that happened overnight and I said, oh, yeah, I did it. You know, no. It was little by little. And once I saw that I could do it, it gave me the courage to take another step and so on and so forth.


 

Scottie: Miss Liz?


 

Miss Liz: Yeah. Well, for me, motherhood did the opposite. I was on the track and going to school and everything but once I had Sylvia, I was like, I can't let anybody else take care of her. It's just got to be me. I have to nourish this baby. I mean, it was such joy was that my heart was outside my body when I saw this child, I cried, you know.. You know, not her almost dying notwithstanding, because the cord was wrapped around her neck and all that stuff. And it was like that was all traumatic, just having how she came in. But when she came in it was my heart outside my body. And I just I, I got totally enmeshed in my kid and that was it until she was able to go to pre-K. Then I looked up and said, okay, what what else does life have? But I just absolutely abandoned everything and said, this is my child and I'm just putting everything I am and everything I have in her and just totally focused. And I'm not saying that that's the way to do it, but that's the way I did it, because I'm I'm always extra. [laughter] I'm over emotional, impact, every emotion prior. So I'm always -- it's in keeping with my character.


 

Sylvia: My cousin, my cousin once told me this story where she was like, when you used to play on the playground with kids and you would go run off and play with kids. Your mom would just be on the side so sad because she's like, she's gonna go make other friends! [laughter] And aunt Hilda was like, well, they're children. Doesn't she need friends? [laughter]


 

Scottie: You can't be her only friend.


 

Sylvia: So people were like, girl, your mama did not want to let you go for nothing when you were a baby. But I get it when you -- I get because we were on bed rest and the umbilical cord was wrapped around my neck and it had to be emergency C-section, that it was a lot. Damn. I'm glad I listened. I'm glad I made it, thank God, because I almost really -- seems like that but --.


 

Miss Shaila:  [Crosstalk] Thanks be to God.


 

Miss Liz: And my family was in Kenya. They weren't here.


 

Sylvia: Yeah.


 

Miss Liz: So it was -- this was the first person that was closest to me here. Part of you.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Your first full relative in -- Yeah.


 

Miss Liz: Yeah. So that that -- yeah.


 

Scottie: So, of course. I need to protect it.


 

Miss Liz: Yeah.


 

Scottie: Absolutely.


 

Miss Liz: Yeah.


 

Scottie: That is --.


 

Sylvia: Yeah.


 

Scottie: Wow.


 

Sylvia: That is a difference too yep, so. So okay, well we was deep just now but we do want to have some fun with our moms because we do like to play games and have fun on this podcast. So we do. When Scottie and I first said yes to making this show, which by the way, can you believe it's been a year? It's been a year officially!


 

Scottie: A year, Sylvio!


 

Sylvia: It's been -- last week was our April --.


 

Scottie: Yes!


 

Sylvia: I mean like, yeah, like the April 30th.


 

Scottie: April 29th?


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] April 30th --.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Oh yeah, 30th.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Was our one year anniversary. And it's blown by so fast that we even forgot the week that episode came out.


 

Scottie: Child.


 

Sylvia: But it's I can't even believe it. We launch it during the pandemic. And to have the Essence and New York Times thing, right. Right, it was one year was just so reaffirming to the mission and all of that of the show. And I love that for us.


 

Miss Shaila:  Congratulations.


 

Sylvia: Thank you.


 

Scottie: Thank you.


 

Sylvia: But when we started a year ago, we we play the game to test how well we know each other. That was one of the first things we did, one of the first segments we recorded. So seeing how you are two women who should know us more than anyone else in the world, keyword being should --.


 

Scottie: Should!


 

Sylvia: We're going to play the same game with y'all that we played with each other to see how well you know us.


 

Miss Shaila:  Okay.


 

Sylvia: So let's do it. Mother daughter trivia!


 

[Music In]


 

[singing].


 

Sylvia: Okay, yes, Scottie?


 

Scottie: [singing] Okay. Okay. So we're going to start with some easy questions because we're going to ease you in. All right, to get you comfortable and then we're going to turn up the heat. [laughter] It's -- don't think it's sweet.


 

Miss Liz: Okay.


 

Scottie: Okay?


 

Sylvia: Don't think it's sweet.


 

Scottie: Now, the first question is and I guess, mom, you go first.


 

Miss Shaila:  Okay.


 

Scottie: What nickname did you call me and still call me?


 

Miss Shaila:  Pooch.


 

Sylvia: Aww.


 

Miss Shaila:  Poochie Naygay. Who would you make it actually short for Poochie Naygay. Yeah.


 

Scottie: [ding] I was gonna -- I was gonna say.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] I'ma need some context. I would need to know how this -- [laughs] I'ma need the story behind this one.


 

Miss Shaila:  That actually came from my great aunt raised me, Ma. When she first saw her. She came to the hospital. She said, oh my gosh, it's such a Poochie Naygay. And I'm like, what is that? And she said, I don't know. [laughter] She's a Poochie Naygay. She looks just like a Poochie Naygay. So I took that and we would call her Poochie Naygay and then I just shortened it to Pooch. And to this day, that's my little Pooch.


 

Sylvia: Awww.


 

Scottie: Mhmm. There it is. And none -- none of y'all better call me Poochie Naygay.


 

Sylvia: Baby we're about to --. I can't wait!


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] I don't want to see that on the Twitter. I don't want to see that on the Instagram.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] I say immediately you, I think might as well change your Twitter name now, girl, cus -- [laughter]


 

Scottie: Uh huh. These hands ain't Pooch, I know that. These hands are definitely Scottie Beam. Try it if you'd like. Okay, Miss Lizz. Your turn. Go ahead.


 

Miss Liz: So I call Syliva, Syl. That's -- I just keep it simple. I just like Syl. And I call her baby girl. You know, Syl and baby girl. That's it.


 

Sylvia: Oh baby girl. [ding]


 

Scottie: That's that's pretty understandable. Silvio is also -- I made a nickname if you want to call her Sylvio.


 

Sylvia: Don't, don't take it. It's not -- [laughter].


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] I get that. Sylvio.


 

Sylvia: It's a nickname that literally only Scottie -- she just took the last inital of my last name.


 

Scottie: I actually -- I call my gaudy grandma Aunt Sylvio sometimes.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Oh.


 

Scottie: I do that sometimes. But her name is Sylvia too. And I love her so much. Shout out to gaudy grandma.


 

Miss Shaila:  Yep.


 

Scottie: Okay, next question. So far, y'all are doing great. What was my favorite food to eat? Miss Liz, you go first cus I'ma give my mom some time -- [laughter] to think. What was Sylvia's favorite food to eat?


 

Miss Liz: It's always been chapati.


 

Sylvia: Oh, yeah, yeah. [ding].


 

Miss Liz: Yeah.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] What's chapati?


 

Sylvia: Chapati's a Kenyan dish. It's a flatbread. It's like if you've eaten Indian food, it's like naan.


 

Scottie: Fried jack.


 

Miss Shaila:  But if it's made-- I think it's better than naan.


 

Sylvia: Yeah it is. We're -- we're a little biased. It's like --.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] More flavor.


 

Sylvia: Now it's like talking jollof but on the east side. It's like, well, you know, chapati’s better.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Okay.


 

Sylvia: But it's -- it's a bread. It's like a fried -- like mom, you can explain it since you don't --.


 

Miss Liz: Yeah. So it's -- it's a bread and I roll it, layer it with butter, roll it, put it on the pan, brown it in both sides. You know, it's not, it's not slimming. But -- [laughter]


 

Sylvia: It's a carb.


 

Miss Liz: [Crosstalk] It's delicious.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Mom, that's like fried jack.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] But you eat with like --.


 

Miss Liz: [Crosstalk] Eat it with either chicken --.


 

Sylvia: Soup, chicken, ground beef like whatever you know. It's like Ethiopians have injera, you know, Indians have naan, Kenyans have chapati. And chapati's always been my favorite.


 

Scottie: Aww! I got to try that.


 

Miss Liz: [Crosstalk] Yeah.


 

Scottie: Sylvia, why you never bought the house?


 

Sylvia: Because my mom, my mom -- I'ma tell you why. My mom just -- I just convinced my mom to start sharing, teaching me how to cook it during the pandemic. And when I asked her earlier, she was like, I -- it's the only way I know I can make you come home. So she didn't teach me how to make it for the longest.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Aww.


 

Sylvia: So Scottie, that's why I didn't know how. So I was --.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Cus


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] She was like --.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Child, we losing recipes.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] We losing the recipes! [laughter]


 

Miss Liz: So Sylvia's having it tonight for dinner. That's what I'm making --


 

Sylvia: I am. It's my last request while she's here. I said, let's go to the store.


 

Miss Liz: [Crosstalk] Her last supper.


 

Sylvia: And get what we need for this chapatis. So yes. Okay.


 

Scottie: Ohhh. Okay. That's a good one. That's a good one.


 

Miss Liz: Yeah.


 

Scottie: Mom.


 

Miss Shaila:  I'll have to try that. Mhmm?


 

Scottie: Go ahead. What's my favorite meal? Well, my favorite food to eat.


 

Miss Liz: Fried chicken. Fried chicken.


 

Sylvia: Okay. That's -- [ding]


 

Scottie: See. But what I wrote down Mom, was --.


 

Miss Shaila:  What'd you put down?


 

Scottie: I wrote down singles cheese slices.


 

Miss Shaila:  Oh.


 

Sylvia: I used to eat those out the fridge too!


 

Scottie: And let me tell you something, Sylvia.


 

Sylvia: I used to just go to the fridge and just --.


 

Miss Shaila:  [Crosstalk] The stories


 

Sylvia: Eat them out the fridge.


 

Scottie: Yeah, the stories you don't remember. [laughter] You don't remember because you were asleep. Sylvia, Miss Liz, my mom would work hard. She's a hard working woman and she would come in and go to sleep. And when it's time to wake up in the morning, I literally had nobody to make me breakfast. So I used to wake up my mom and be like, Hey, Mom, breakfast time. And she used to be like, okay, coming. And then seven hours later and ain't nobody come, she's still asleep. So I would go, okay, well, I know for a fact that there are singles that are my height in that refrigerator.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] In that fridge.


 

Scottie: And I would tear them up! I would eat a whole pack and of them --


 

Miss Liz: And a trail of the plastic wrappers in the kitchen --.


 

Scottie: Right.


 

Miss Liz: When I wake up, I'm like, what are all these plastic wrappers on the floor? Scottie eating cheese.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] And those were delicious.


 

Sylvia: They are good.


 

Scottie: Now don't call DYFS is on my mother. My mom has literally, my girl was working and she was tired, but -- and she was a single mother, so she really, she really didn't have the time. But also I want to give a shout out to my sister who also didn't -- was jobless. Coulda got up and cooked me breakfast but said absolutely not. You figure it out on your own. I literally said this weekend, Sylvia, I promise. I said, hey, are you going to make me some breakfast since I'm a guest? I here. She said, you got the wrong mother. [laughter] You got the wrong mother. You know, I don't make no breakfast.


 

Miss Shaila:  [Crosstalk] Wrong kind of mother.


 

Scottie: You know, that's not what I do.


 

Sylvia: Oh, okay. Okay, let's -- we goin keep moving on. But we're going to turn up the ante a little bit Scottie, just a little bit.


 

Scottie: Yes.


 

Sylvia: We're going to see. So the next one is, what are some albums? I put some -- like an album we would listen to in the house growing up. So I know for Miss Shaila, it's probably going to be album for both of you. Mom, I don't know if you remember the album that both of us used to listen to or any of the ones, but like Miss Shaila, do you want to go first and pick what would come to Scottie's mind?


 

Miss Shaila:  My we listened to an array but they all were in the 80s.


 

Scottie: Yes. [ding]


 

Miss Shaila:  So I will say that. It was all 80s music. There's a song that I remember, I don't know why I remember us cleaning, you know, Saturdays everybody had chores, they had to clean. And I remember cleaning to Shalamar, [sings] Make this a night to remember. I don't know what that song sticking out to me.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Get ready, tonight.


 

Miss Shaila: [Crosstalk] Get ready tonight. Tonight. You know, I don't know why that one stands out the most to me, but "Night to Remember" and everything 80s. Michael Jackson, for sure, hands down "Off the Wall," "Thriller" and everything else that followed. Everything with Michael Jackson.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Please, my mom's the biggest Michael Jackson fan.


 

Miss Shaila:  Yeah.


 

Scottie: Yes.


 

Miss Shaila: That explains why Scottie likes disco so much because that is her favorite kind of music.


 

Miss Shaila:  Oh, yeah.


 

Scottie: Oh yeah. Me and Mommy go home for some Donna Summer. Say what?!


 

Miss Shaila: [Crosstalk] Let's dance! [laughter]


 

Scottie: That is a jam. We will sing that --


 

Miss Shaila: [Crosstalk] The veins coming out of our necks.


 

Scottie: Hello! Bee Gees. We will sing some Bee Gees.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] My mom -- loves my mom, love the Bee Gees. She does love the Bee Gees.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Oh my god. The Bee Gees.


 

Sylvia: Okay, Mom. What's an album for -- what's the one for me and you?


 

Miss Liz: So for me and you, just to trail on, I loved all those songs. Shaila talked about Shalamar, the Bee Gees, all of them. I had those growing up but when I met -- when I was with Sylvia, I would listen -- I'd let her listen -- Sylvia took charge when she was a kid. I let her listen to her song --.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Shocking nobody.


 

Scottie: To no one. Ever.


 

Miss Liz: I just enjoyed her music and she loved to listen to Destiny's Child. That's why she started with the lover of Beyonce and then --.


 

Sylvia: Let them know. Early. Day one fan. [laughs]


 

Miss Liz: Yes, yes, yes. She transitioned right from Destiny's Child to Beyonce, then Aaliyah. She like the Spice Girls. She had an array of music. Yeah.


 

Sylvia: I did love the Spice Girls. [ding]


 

Miss Shaila: Yeah. Yeah. Deanii for her it was Kanye West out of the box, Late Registration. That was very, probably the first album that I remember hearing over and over and over and over again. And there's another one that stands out to me. What's that one Deanii, the [sings]. It's going down. That that's when I remember -- [laughter] From when you were 15. Everybody doing it.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Young Joc. Young Joc, Scottie?!


 

Miss Shaila: [Crosstalk] It's going down. [sings].


 

Sylvia: Wow. We really --.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] No, here's the thing, guys.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] We learning, we learning something. Scottie, you was, it was going, you was --.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] No guys. Listen, mom.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Tell us. Tell us.


 

Scottie: No. I was a big 106 & Park fan. So, Mom, would you hear me?


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Who amongst us was not?


 

Scottie: Mom would hear me listen to the countdown all the time.


 

Sylvia: Okay.


 

Scottie: I'd listen -- sometimes I even, like, record it just to watch it over. I loved the 106 & Park countdown and, you know, "It's Going Down" was number one for like eight months.


 

Sylvia: [laughs] It was a while. My mom was also -- my mom was also horrified at the way we were dancing at my sweet 16. So. [laughs].


 

Miss Liz: You used to love that 106 & Park. Mhmm.


 

Sylvia: But --.


 

Scottie: Mhmm.


 

Miss Shaila:  Yeah. And "Chicken Noodle Soup."


 

Sylvia: Every day.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] "Chicken Noodle Soup."


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Every day.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Was a big one.


 

Sylvia: My stories with a soda on the side.


 

Miss Shaila:  [Crosstalk] Web -- Webstar came to her sweet 16 and they performed so she was like --


 

Sylvia: What a flex!


 

Miss Shaila:  [Crosstalk] She was, let me tell you, she was in shock. I would never see that look on her face again.


 

Sylvia: Wow. So you have one of them, like --.


 

Scottie: First of all --.


 

Sylvia: You have one of them surprise artists slated on MTV?


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] I'm about to say --


 

Sylvia: You had a MTV super sweet sixteen? Wow.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Absolutely. I had the best sweet sixteen in Piscataway High School history. Please. [laughter] If anybody would like to debate me, please do. All right, on this here Twitter account.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Oh my goodness.


 

Scottie: Do it if you like, but 2008 -- from 2004 to 2008 -- I had the best sweet sixteen in Piscataway.


 

Sylvia: Not you put a lock down on all for years, not just in 2006.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Yes because my invitations were CDs. Okay? You had to listen to the CD to get the directions of my party. And then on top of that, I had all -- sorry.


 

Sylvia: That's -- [laughs]


 

Scottie: On top of that. One second. On top of that, I had all these different artists talking through the album. Remember that mom? Like --.


 

Miss Shaila:  Well, yeah, they did the invitation. So you had Jay Z, you had Beyonce saying, hey! Don't forget, October such and such.


 

Sylvia: Oh you mashed it up?


 

Scottie: Yeah.


 

Miss Shaila:  Yeah. We put all their voices together for the invitation.


 

Sylvia: So, yes, it was a moment. I will say. It was the best --.


 

Sylvia: Where was MTV? What a fail on their part for that capturing this for all of us to see.


 

Scottie: They wasn't trying to come to Piscataway. [laughter] They wasn't trying to come to Jerse.


 

Sylvia: Oh my god come to Jerse! I thought would do something. I have little scrolls and I thought it was really cute.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Oh scrolls!


 

Sylvia: But we have a little scroll invites for mine. And I had a little basket and I was passing them out. And everybody be like, Sylvia where's my scroll? I want a scroll? The scroll had you in high school poppin. Y'all remember, y'all was there. [laughs] But that was it. The little scrolls. We were up at the table making them.


 

Scottie: Yes.


 

Sylvia: All night.


 

Scottie: Those are good.


 

Miss Shaila:  Wow.


 

Sylvia: That is very cute. Okay.


 

Scottie: Next one.


 

Sylvia: What -- oh. Miss Shaila, I'm coming to you first with this one --.


 

Miss Shaila: [Crosstalk] Uh oh.


 

Sylvia: Because I-- the streets have got to know. What did Scottie get most in trouble for as a kid?


 

Miss Shaila:  Losing every damn thing. [laughter]


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Oh my god.


 

Miss Shaila:  Scottie had no kind of concept of holding on to anything. Gloves --


 

Sylvia: To this day! To be honest.


 

Miss Shaila:  How could you lose your glasses?! [laughter] You can't see if you don't have glasses! How can you lose your glasses?


 

Sylvia: You ain't noticed it was blank?


 

Miss Shaila:  Exactly. That's what I'm saying.


 

Scottie: I used to hide behind my friend's mom. [laughter] Like please. But here's the thing.


 

Sylvia: Please save me.


 

Scottie: Mom would say, where is that hair tie that I gave you in 1966 at 10:32 pm? [laughter] Where is it?


 

Sylvia: Don't --.


 

Scottie: Why don't you have it. And I'd be like at this point I don't -- ma'am. I don't know where it is! And it's always hats. it's small things. Hats, a sock, a shoe tie. Something like that and I'm six, seven years. I don't know! But Mom, it really drove --


 

Miss Shaila:  [Crosstalk] It wasn't that small. Glasses from age six.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Exactly.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Don't be sorry, Miss Shaila, tell her.


 

Scottie: I was six, mom. What do you -- I -- nobody was wearing glasses back then.


 

Miss Shaila:  [Crosstalk] But you can't see! Who loses their glasses that they can't see. I mean she had really bad vision. [laughter].


 

Scottie: I --.


 

Miss Shaila:  We're talking super coke bottle glasses --.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] coke bottle. Thanks mom.


 

Miss Shaila:  [Crosstalk] And your eyes are this small --


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] I'm living. I hope y'all livin like I am, people, listeners.


 

Scottie: Alright. Miss Liz? Take it away.


 

Miss Liz: Oh my God. Sylvia, hmm. Sylvia -- okay, so Sylvia thinks she --.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] I already know what this is.


 

Miss Liz: It's the books. She wouldn't cook. You tell her to do something, she's in the book. Come back an hour later, she's still in the same spot reading the book, didn't do what you told her to do. So that was, that was the first thing. The second thing is that those books, she had words. And this was she was known for in school, like even with a boy, she couldn't fight physically but she could with words --.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Mmm. That mouth. I Know it.


 

Miss Liz: So she'd tell them, she'd tell you something and you had to go look in the dictionary before you could respond. You didn't know whether to be angry or not. [laughter]


 

Sylvia: Or impressed --. [laughs]


 

Miss Liz: Until you find out what that word was.


 

Sylvia: It was -- it was my mouth.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] I knew it. I said, I know it's the mouth.


 

Miss Liz: And she -- and she knew how to do it nicely. To her sister, she just lost it. [laughter] But she, Sylvia, knew how to do it real smooth. And she's witty. So you have to think. We walk away and then you said that girl just -- [laughter] she was gone.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Did she call me an idiot? She just called me an idiot.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Did she -- did my daughter just -- I'm really just prepared. Like, if I have a daughter, I already know where my karma is coming in. I already -- she's going to be the most talkingest back little girl.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Mouth, mouth, mouth.


 

Sylvia: I am just going to have to know that that's my penance.


 

Miss Liz: Yes.


 

Sylvia: But yes, my mouth is --[ding] I feel like I was a good kid.


 

Miss Liz: [Crosstalk] Yeah, you were.


 

Sylvia: For me, it really was just my mouth. Like she be like, don't talk back to me. Watch your tone. You don't -- my mom hated sarcasm. And, you know, I speak fluent sarcasm.


 

Miss Liz: [Crosstalk] Oh my gosh. You are the queen of sarcasm. Mhmm.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Yes, she is.


 

Sylvia: Sarcasm is my second language. So it was really tough. I was like, wow, are we compatible? Like I love sarcasm. [laughs].


 

[Music In].


 

Sylvia: Okay so trivia was fun. Now, what we want to do is talk to you guys about your top three celebrity crushes. Because on this here show we talk about thirst a lot.


 

Scottie: Mhmm.


 

Sylvia: With our guests, with ourselves, with our audience, our listeners. It's a thing. So while we have our mothers here, we just need to know if our tastes align or where it gets from. But we need to hear what your -- who are your top three celebrity crushes are. So let's start with my mom.


 

Scottie: Miss Liz. Take it away.


 

Miss Liz: Well, one of mine is dead.


 

Sylvia: Oh, that's -- kick it off --. [laughs]


 

Scottie: Jeez.


 

Sylvia: Okay. What a way to go. [laughs.


 

Scottie: What a way to start.


 

Sylvia: You just really just came hot.


 

Miss Liz: [Crosstalk] Listen, listen, listen. I have his post on my bedroom wall, a big old blown up poster of him when I was younger. He -- Teddy Pendergrass. It was --.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Oh that's a fine man.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Teddy. Teddy was a fine man. [laughs]


 

Miss Liz: [Crosstalk] That he was -- he was the finest looking when he was in my youth, man. I used to look at it and say, oh my God. And then he could sing! Oh, my God, yes, that was the man. But most recently, Jesse Williams and Michael Ealy.


 

Scottie: Oh! You got my taste, Miss Liz!


 

Sylvia: Y'all do have the same -- y'all have the same taste.


 

Miss Liz: [Crosstalk] Something about them eyes.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] That's my taste!


 

Sylvia: The way I discovered that my mother and Scottie Beam have the same taste in men, it was really a -- it was really -- it took me on a journey. [laughs].


 

Scottie: Right. You said Michael Ealy, I just knew.


 

Sylvia: But Michael Ealy and Jesse Williams are very attractive men for sure. I just didn't know you had it for the green-eyed bandits like that.


 

Miss Shaila:  Yeah.


 

Miss Liz: Yes, yes.


 

Sylvia: Okay!


 

Scottie: Alright, Miss Liz.


 

Sylvia: Okay, Miss Shaila. How about you Miss Shaila?


 

Scottie: All right, man.


 

Miss Liz: Well, if you took me back to my teenage years, you would have to be Michael Jackson.


 

Scottie: Yep.


 

Miss Liz: Just had a thing for that "Off The Wall" Michael, maybe even the "Thriller" Michael.


 

Sylvia: Yeah. Those were good, those were good years for him.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Yes it was.


 

Miss Liz: And but as I got older -- then I was still into older men because I really had a thing for Denzel Washington. He was very, very, very good looking. But another one would have to be Blair Underwood. Blair Underwood to me --.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Ooooh.


 

Miss Shaila:  Has always been one of the finest Black men I have ever seen.


 

Scottie: Finest Black man you've ever seen, Mom?


 

Miss Shaila:  [Crosstalk] Blair!


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] The way Scottie judges peoples' crushes --.


 

Miss Shaila:  [Crosstalk] Underwood!?


 

Sylvia: Is, is --.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Blair looks like my father! What is there what are you talking about?


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Well, I guess that would make sense, wouldn't it, Scottie?


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] I mean, yes.


 

Sylvia: He's your father. [laughs]. But Blair Underwood is I feel like a lot of women would say that was a solid choice. All that judgment in your, Blair Underwood? [laughs]


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] I mean -- Blair.


 

Miss Shaila:  Your name could have easily been Deanii Underwood right about now.


 

Scottie: Girl. Girl.


 

Sylvia: Can I tell you, can I tell you what's so funny about Blair Underwood? Because I -- he is an attractive man. My mom does this thing where if she watches somebody in a role where they're a bad husband --.


 

Miss Shaila:  [Crosstalk] Yes.


 

Sylvia: Like she, she holds their acting roles against them. [laughter] And I'm like, mom, it was acting. It's not real.


 

Miss Liz: [Crosstalk] Yeah, yeah, yeah.


 

Sylvia: She's like, I don't care. I don't like him.


 

Miss Liz: [Crosstalk] Right. It was that Madea place.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] I don't him. Ain't that the man that was beatin that man that Madea movie?


 

Miss Liz: The Madea play, yes.


 

Sylvia: And I'll be like mom, but that wasn't Blair. He was a -- I don't care.


 

Miss Liz: Right. Yeah.


 

Sylvia: She does that with everybody.


 

Scottie: That's why everybody is like Michael Ealy, we forgive you for what he did --.


 

Miss Liz: Yes.


 

Sylvia: In For Colored Girls?


 

Scottie: For Colored Girls. We forgive you. Because that's how fine he is.


 

Miss Liz: [Crosstalk] Yes, yes.


 

Scottie: We gonna forgive you for dropping them kids show.


 

Sylvia: That's true because, wow, that is the one man, mom. You still like Michael even after he hung them kids from that window. [laughs]


 

Miss Liz: [Crosstalk] Oh my god.


 

Sylvia: Okay, well, we've learned a little something today. Denzel and Blair are solid choices. And Michael Jackson.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Yes.


 

Sylvia: And my mom said, Teddy. The Teddy --.


 

Scottie: Teddy's fine.


 

Sylvia: The Teddy through me for a loop but Teddy's a fine -- that was a fine Black man gone too soon. RIP.


 

Scottie: Mhmm. Okay.


 

Sylvia: She's like, but mine's dead.


 

Miss Liz: Mine's dead, right.


 

Scottie: Mine is dead. [laughter] Hot and dark. Real quick.


 

Sylvia: I was like who are we gonna talk about? Oh, all right. Well, okay. So the final thing we have got to do, and I demanded this early on, I'm glad Scottie Beam agree because I know my sister's needs, right. And I knew -- and I also know what the people want. And I said the most -- the most infamous game we've ever played on this podcast is does Scottie know this white person? To me and my -- and that came from me and Scottie's friendship, because I would notice that Scottie just did not know a lot of white actors. And as an entertainment reporter where it's my job to have to know those things, I just was like always like, wait, what? So and she would always say, the way I grew up, we ain't watched this. [laughter] Or my mom only watch Black movies. And my mom is just Blackity Black Black Black and that's what I don't know, no, nothin, nothin, nothing. So I said, we have Miss Shaila here. I have got to give her a chance to see who is right here in the battle of whose fault is it that Scottie don't know these white people. [laughs].


 

Scottie: So we're going to, we're going to do a little trivia, mom. I can't wait because you claim that I saw Home Alone sometime and that was not true. I had never seen that movie a damn day in my life, until I got older, ma. And you don't even know -- who who is the lead of that movie?


 

Miss Shaila:  I do know. Macaulay Culkin.


 

Sylvia: There you go. [dings].


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Oh.


 

Sylvia: Already already doing better.


 

Miss Shaila:  Well, he was a very good friend of Michael Jackson.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] That's true.


 

Scottie: Ohh! That's why you know. That's why, you know.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] That's why -- [laughs].


 

Scottie: It's always three degrees from a Black person. So either way.


 

Sylvia: And I --.


 

Miss Shaila:  I've never seen Home Alone either.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Yes!


 

Sylvia: That is true. So Scottie wasn't lying when she said she had never watched him alone. That was a family movie in my household. We watched it. I mopped so I could get the TV.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Go ahead, Sylvia. I can't wait.


 

Sylvia: Okay, so I'm a US with five. I'm a. I think -- I'm gonna to do the five that I feel like is the best summary of the game. But these are the same -- they will -- these will be the same questions we asked Deanii that episode. So here we go.


 

Miss Shaila:  Okay.


 

Sylvia: Who starred in Sleepless in Seattle? Who are the two stars?


 

Miss Shaila:  Oh, Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan? [buzzer]


 

Sylvia: You're thinking of When Harry Met Sally.


 

Miss Shaila:  Oh.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] It's one of them whites. That's what I'm saying. They go somewhere.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] But Meg Ryan, Meg Ryan is correct. But --.


 

Miss Shaila:  Wait.


 

Sylvia: It's the other movie with Meg Ryan. [laughter] And my mom loved this movie. Mom, do you know who the other actor is in Sleepless in Seattle?


 

Miss Liz: I don't know.


 

Sylvia: Oh, but you love this movie. It's so funny because, like, my mom made me watch them.


 

Miss Liz: See, I watch all the movies, but I never learned their -- their real names. [laughter]


 

Scottie: That's right. So it's Harry and Sally.


 

Miss Liz: [Crosstalk] Yes, that's it. That's what I know.


 

Scottie: Yes. That's right. Mom --


 

Sylvia: It was it a Tom. It was one of the Toms. It was --.


 

Miss Shaila: [Crosstalk] One of the Toms. Tom Hanks!


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] It was Tom Hanks.


 

Miss Shaila:  Okay, Tom Hanks.


 

Sylvia: Tom Hanks, Tom Hanks. Okay. So far--.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Gonna tell y'all


 

Sylvia: Okay we're -- it's one zero but I mean, she did get that one. Who stars in the Titanic, Miss Shaila?


 

Miss Shaila:  Leo. [dings].


 

Sylvia: Correct, Leo, yes.


 

Scottie: Who was the white woman, mom?


 

Miss Shaila:  Um. [laughter]


 

Scottie: Yeah. We all know Leo, sis.


 

Miss Shaila:  A very nice actor.


 

Sylvia: A very nice actress! [buzzer].


 

Miss Shaila:  I get you. I'm with you.


 

Sylvia: Kate -- Kate Winslet. Kate Winslet was the other --.


 

Miss Shaila:  Okay. [laughter]


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] The other actress. Okay. All right. We're going to make this -- now we're gonna do a either or to help you out.


 

Miss Shaila:  Okay.


 

Sylvia: Was it Sandra -- this is going to be, was it Sandra Bullock or Jennifer Aniston? It's like one of their movies. Okay. Miss Congeniality.


 

Miss Shaila:  Sandra Bullock.


 

Sylvia: [ding] Correct.


 

Miss Shaila:  Right.


 

Scottie: I got that right. I got that right. Yeah, I got that.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Uh? My mom -- even my mom knew that one.


 

Miss Shaila: [Crosstalk] Yes, she does like that movie.


 

Sylvia: I guess the Blacks -- the Blacks love Sandra.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Yeah.


 

Sylvia: Sandra really got in with us there. [laughter] She did. She snuck her way in.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Until she did Blindside. All right. Go ahead.


 

Sylvia: Okay, Bruce Almighty.


 

Miss Shaila:  Oh. Jim Carrey!


 

Sylvia: Correct. [ding] But -- and whether Jennifer or Sandra


 

Miss Shaila:  Oh! Jennifer or Sandra?


 

Scottie: Mmm. One of them white women, huh?


 

Miss Shaila:  One of them was in there?


 

Scottie: One of them.


 

Sylvia: Yeah


 

Miss Shaila:  I don't know. Okay, Jennifer.


 

Sylvia: Correct?


 

Scottie: Yes, she -- [laughs] Process of elimination.


 

Sylvia: She did, she corrected. But she did this with the Jim Carrey, which is what we can say that you did.


 

Scottie: Nuh-uh. That's my favorite movie. Yes.


 

Sylvia: Okay.


 

Scottie: It was taking place in Buffalo, by the way. I love that -- that's the way the cookie crumbles is my favorite favorite line from Bruce Almighty. I love that film.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Oh okay.


 

Scottie: I love anything Jim Carrey. Yeah, Okay. I love Jim Carrey.


 

Sylvia: Okay, which Emma was it?


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Oohhhh.


 

Sylvia: It's between Emma Roberts, Emma Stone, and Emma Watson.


 

Miss Shaila:  Lord.


 

Sylvia: Should we just pass that one over you and --.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] No, no, no. Read it! Read it. Go ahead. Go ahead, Sylvio.


 

Miss Shaila:  Emma Watson, Emma who?


 

Sylvia: Emma Stone or Emma Roberts.


 

Scottie: Mhmm.


 

Sylvia: Emma Roberts is Julia Roberts's niece. Emma Stone is the redheaded one. Emma Watson -- well, anyway. that's the most I can do. The Harry Potter movies, do you know which, Emma was in the Harry water movie.


 

Miss Shaila:  Nope. Never saw Harry Potter.


 

Sylvia: Whoo.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] I told you.


 

Miss Shaila:  [Crosstalk] Not one.


 

Scottie: There it is. [buzzer]


 

Sylvia: Okay. La La Land. Do you know which Emma starred in La La Land?


 

Scottie: No, you do not, Mom. Just go ahead.


 

Miss Shaila:  Emma Stone. [ding]


 

Sylvia: Yes!


 

Scottie: Oh!


 

Miss Shaila:  Emma Stone?


 

Sylvia: Yes! [laughter]


 

Scottie: One for you.


 

Sylvia: American Horror Story, the TV show.


 

Miss Shaila:  Emma Parker. [buzzer]


 

Scottie: Yep.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Nope. No it is not, Shaila.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Yes it is. It works for me.


 

Sylvia: You know what? It's fine.


 

Scottie: Emma Parker is it for me, works. What did we learn here, Sylvia?


 

Sylvia: I think it's -- see, I think we learned that Scottie was telling the truth.


 

Scottie: Thank you god. [laughter]


 

Sylvia: I think that right. Scottie Beam has been redeemed in this scenario.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Thank you, thank you. Absolutely.


 

Sylvia: And you know Miss Shaila I -- we respect the the not paying attention to the whites as a form of activism and self care on this show. So we get it.


 

Scottie: Right. But if we're talking about blue eyed soul, if we're talking about --.


 

Miss Shaila:  Oh Lord!


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Right now, if we're talking about white people and music.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Talking about white music


 

Miss Shaila:  Or even country, you know, like, "We Never Loved at All." That song is one of me and Deanii's favorite favorite songs.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Wow.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] So when it comes to --.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] See we never listened to country music.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Oh, we love country --.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] We never listened to country.


 

Miss Shaila:  [Crosstalk] Yeah. So, I mean, but that's what I was saying earlier, that everything in our life was musically infused and from her birth to now.


 

Scottie: Right.


 

Miss Shaila:  So, I mean, we can sing just about anything --.


 

Scottie: Yeah.


 

Miss Shaila:  From from anywhere, from all genres of music.


 

Scottie: Yep. Yes, we are.


 

[Music In]


 

Scottie: So we are so happy that we got to have our mommies on the show. It's such a special moment for both of us. But right now, you know, I think our moms have done enough talking.


 

[Music Out].


 

Sylvia: Correct.


 

Scottie: And I think me and you, Sylvia, should sit here and maybe give flowers to our moms. I know we do it all the time, but there is never too much flowers, especially when they're on this earth, you know. So I think it's super important for us to just tell our moms publicly, privately, any time how much they mean to us and you know, how appreciative we are of their support and love. So, Mommy, I am the woman I am because of your actions when you thought I wasn't looking. Okay. How you treat people with compassion and grace, how you stand up for those who are too afraid to speak for themselves, how you've built tribes on trust and respect as the foundation. You know, how you've watched over Ma and Papa until they watch -- now they watch over you. You know, how you've mastered the art of turning wounds into wisdom. You know, I -- I learned so much from that, you know, learning how to heal. I learned that from you. Your love is so potent and so paramount that people who listen to your voice have named their kids after you. You know, your love has the ability to turn houses into homes, you know, car rides into unforgettable experiences. Mom, you are literally -- and I say this until I'm dead -- but you are my blueprint. You know, your love is the reason why I'm here. Your prayers, although that you say that, you know, I exceed your expectations, your prayers got me here. You know, your prayers saw it for me. Even though when you couldn't really envision it, your prayers saw it first. So I am so appreciative and thankful to have such a supportive, loving, fearless mother. You know, I say this again all the time, that my mom is a single mom and the -- you know, there is no manual. There is no guide to a -- raising three kids on your own. There is no guide. You -- there is nobody that can teach you that. And also to be, you know, blindsided by it and thinking that, you know, you were gonna -- we're going to have a two parent home, you know, where you had to adapt and do what's best for your family and still do what you love and love the people in it. You know, you've taught me so much and I am forever grateful, Mommy. There is not a day that will go by that I don't think God for you, thank God, because I don't know. I wouldn't be on this podcast. I wouldn't be doing what I do now. There would be no Essence. There would be no no New York Times. There would be no anything without you, period. There -- it doesn't exist. So I just have to say thank you for giving me the first image of love. And that's you. You've always been that for me. You are my synonym of joy. You are my home, mommy. So thank you so much. I appreciate you from the bottom of my hearts, the depths of my soul. You are my number one. Thank you. Oh Mommy, don't cry. I got through it, though girl, didn't I? I did, I did.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] You did.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] I'm doing well.


 

Sylvia: You -- [laughs] you did well --.


 

Scottie: But now my mom is crying and I, you know, I -- I don't --


 

Sylvia: I mean how could you not after that? That's beautiful --.


 

Scottie: There is not -- seriously, there's nobody that could have done it better. You are music to my ears mommy. Thank you so much.


 

Sylvia: Ooh, my goodness.


 

Scottie: Of course.


 

Sylvia: I shoulda gone first. [laughs]


 

Scottie: I don't --.


 

Sylvia: What am I suppposed to do? Scottie done pass the time limit they gave us. She done broke every rue.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] No, I'm sorry!


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] You know I be following rules. And you just goin make me look bad like this?


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] That is my mom. I got -- that's my mom. And that's from my heart -- from my heart. I don't have nothing written down, wrote down --


 

Sylvia: No, no. Even though you was rhyming, you was rhyming. You just had from wounds to wisdom to this --.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Let me tell you something.


 

Sylvia: A poet?


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Don't sleep.


 

Sylvia: Shakespeare?


 

Scottie: Remember -- don't forget the journal.


 

Sylvia: Rap -- Oh, the journal you write -- [laughs].


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Okay? So yeah, a girl knows how to rap and rhyme but yeah.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Oh yes. That's so beautiful.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] I am so grateful. I'm so, so grateful for your mother. And I hope if I live -- I mean I live another life and I love the life of another life, I hope that I get the same mom every single time.


 

Sylvia: Okay, well, well, in addition to saying plus one to the 17,000 words Scottie just said --.


 

Scottie: [laughs]I'm sorry. [laughter].


 

Sylvia: No, because I love my mom too.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Yes.


 

Sylvia: I just, I think for me it's very -- I've said this before and I think we've said all of these things before. But I, for me, when I think of unconditional love, it's my mom.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] yeah.


 

Sylvia: That's the that's the -- she is the example of unconditional love for me, to me. I have -- she's the only person in my life who has loved me and never went anywhere. And never made me feel like there was a threat of her going anywhere if I didn't behave a certain way or act accordingly or raise up to a certain standard. I feel -- and there's that safety in that and then there's that freedom in that to be like you can be who you are. You can be the worst, best versions of yourself. And I'm still not going anywhere. I'll still love you. And I'm just so thankful to have experienced that because -- and I think when you're -- I was younger, I took it for granted because I just assumed that everybody's mom loved them like that.


 

Scottie: Right.


 

Sylvia: And then you get older and you realize like, oh, my goodness. Like because to me that's just what a mother's love should be like. The way Scottie's talks about her mom, the way I'm talking about you, like to realize that, like, that's not the case, and there's just so many people out here who are just moving around, not even knowing the basic example of how am I supposed to love somebody? When people compliment me talking about, like, how nurturing I am or how I'm such a good tribe builder, like how I'm -- literally my friends will jokingly call me Mama Syl. That all comes because you were my mom and that was how I was taught to love people, fiercely.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Yes, yes.


 

Sylvia: Fiercely loving people is something that I have gotten from you. Building a tribe, like you said, is something I've gotten for you. You came here without -- with none of your family here. So you didn't even have family members to pick from when you had to build your tribe. It was just friends and you managed -- and because you were such a big lover, they loved us like we were their blood. You know, these are people whose houses we were at for holidays, these are the on side -- you know play aunts I have that I could think of who helped us at every stage of our life, whether it was school or college or whatever else, or just growing up and having around. Like it was a tribe that you built from your friends. Then you've had -- even the idea of having the same friends, people are like, how do you have friends from childhood who are still your friends today? I get that from you. You have had the same set of friends my whole life, for a lot of them, you know what I mean. So it's like I get -- the kind of woman I am when it comes to how I love and how I treat people, that is you. And I -- to me, I just think that what makes it even more beautiful is that you were able to have that kind of heart and love that much despite being around such a lack of that.


 

Scottie: Right.


 

Sylvia: Nobody was pointing to you the way you were pointed to us, and you still were like Poyan from an empty cup.


 

Scottie: Yeah.


 

Sylvia: And to me, that's the part where I don't even understand how. You know what I mean? Like how that -- even if you were, you know, like no matter what kind of broken place you may have been into, it never impacted the love we felt from you. And I know that takes a lot of strength. Now, as a grown woman --.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Whew!


 

Sylvia: I know it takes a lot of strength and resilience that as a child you just don't know. And your ability to rise from it each and every time and reinvent yourself as need be each and every time that takes courage and strength. And even as you do it now, I -- the those are the moments where I am the most proud of you because it takes a lot to continue to rebuild. As somebody here, like I said again, your your your family, your brother -- your brothers, your sisters, your parents are not here. And you have done that. And I think for me, it's just super inspiring to see the family you've been able to build here and your faith and how you love God and how you've taught me to keep him at the center is the greatest gift you've given me as a mother. But you're also the closest thing to God's love that I feel here on Earth. You're the only example of when I think about what God's love must be like, you know, I think about you and how you love me and how you've protected us. And it really -- it's priceless. And sometimes I just feel like there's never really the right words to actually fit how I actually feel. But for me, it's just truly the comfort of knowing that, like, I know what it's like to be loved unconditionally and fiercely. And if I never know that from anybody else, I can never say I'd never had it.


 

Scottie: That's right.


 

Sylvia: You know, and I and I love you for that always. So thank you.


 

Scottie: Oh.


 

Miss Liz: Thank you.


 

Scottie: It was beautiful, Sylvio. [laughter] That was great. Thank you guys for sitting with us and talking to us. I really appreciate that because --


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] And yes -- and being a part of our shenanigans. [laughs]


 

Scottie: Right.


 

Miss Shaila:  That's another proud moment.


 

Miss Liz: Yeah.


 

Miss Shaila:  I think Liz will agree that this is another one of those wow moments that we're able to sit here and have this conversation and that you want to bring us into this conversation.


 

Miss Liz: Yes, that that is beautiful, right there. That they want to bring us in. And, you know, that's not always the case. And it's -- they love us that much and are proud of us that much to want to bring us and that is -- that's just so beautiful.


 

Scottie: Listen, I'm gonna --


 

Sylvia: I feel like our listeners can only know -- like it only makes -- like if they really want to know us, it's like you said, you got to meet our moms. That's part of it. So we're happy that even the family we're cultivating in our community are getting the chance to meet our family in this way, I think for both me and Scottie, you two are the core of our family. I think the same thing -- like we don't have big families, but we have the love that's felt even in the small versions of the families we have. And I think that's why it's so important. Like the easiest way to get a glimpse or more understanding of us is to meet our mothers. So I love that we were able to do this. And I also want to give you guys both a chance to plug. Like if our listeners like, oh my God, I love them both so much work. Where can I know more? Where can I see more? I want you guys to tell them, like, you know, Miss Shaila, how you -- we -- you know, you are, what is it, New York, sweetheart, ha! I follow you on Instagram?


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] She is.


 

Sylvia: I've seen the logos.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] She is.


 

Sylvia: I seen the -- I seen the -- I said, okay, Deanii, she's New York's sweetheart.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] She is.


 

Sylvia: And you know, they can hear you on the radio if we want to give you a chance to plug that. Mom, you're a grief counselor. Right now I think that's a necessary thing for people as we were coming out of this pandemic and fresh in between Mothers' and Fathers' Day, like, there's a lot there that you -- people may be able to get from you. So tell them how they can find you guys.


 

Miss Liz: Yeah, well, for me, they call -- I'm known as Mama Liz [laughs] to millennials.


 

Scottie: Aww.


 

Miss Liz: But I walk with them through life. I'm a life coach, but I'm also a grief counselor. And i -- you can find me at life -- @lifewithlizanne on Instagram. And you can book me on @lifewithlizann on Instagram. So Sylvia knows my handle. You know where to find me. And I just I'm a lover of people. I'm -- I'm an empath. And I just, whenever people come to me, I become so enmeshed and so invest -- vested in their lives and walking them through that healing process. And that's what I love to do. That's who I am is I'm a healer, healer of the broken. Whether you broken through grief, whether you're broken through life, whatever kind of brokenness there is, what I do is I walk you to that healing place. That's what I love to do.


 

Scottie: That's beautiful, Miss Liz.


 

Miss Shaila:  And I am a radio personality for 107.5 WBLS. You can hear me Monday through Friday, 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. I would love to have you join me. I also am the founder and CEO of SisterlyKiss.com. Sisterly Kiss Entertainment Foundation, which is a foundation that always tries to encourage and uplift and entertain women in need. We usually have around this time a spa party to benefit survivors of domestic violence where we give them massages and makeovers. And we can't do that physically this year, so we're going to do a pamper me party this Saturday, May 15th. You can get the link by just emailing me shaila@sisterlykiss.com. Get a link and join me and make a donation to the foundation, which we're going to donate to one of the area shelters so they could do something for the mothers who have to be in a domestic violence shelter around this time. And you can also, of course, join the foundation as well and help us to do some of the work that we do in the community at SisterlyKiss.com.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Aww. Y'all make me so proud.


 

Sylvia: Great. We'll put those links and we'll put those links in the episode info for you guys listening -- in the episode details, we'll put the links there.


 

Scottie: And also, I see so much -- I just want to say this Miss Liz, I see so much of you in Sylvia.


 

Miss Liz: Awww.


 

Scottie: And because I've met Sylvia first, it's so beautiful to see the impact that you've had on Sylvia and how careful and whole -- loving fiercely, what she said earlier, is what Sylvia does. She will feel my pain. Literally, try to get deep inside of it as much as she can. As as uncomfortable as it is, it is so -- it is truly like an experience to have somebody who will go through it with me and hold my hand and say, I will feel this with you. I can't feel it for you, but I'll feel it with you.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] I'll feel it with you. Yeah.


 

Scottie: And that's what Sylvia is to me. She is my companion girl. That's my sis. And I am so happy to speak to you again, Miss Liz, because, you know, every time is a gift. So thank you so, so much.


 

Sylvia: [Crosstalk] Yes. I love that.


 

Miss Liz: [Crosstalk] Thank you.


 

Sylvia: I'm so glad we got to do it. And I think me -- I think once I realized Scottie's relationship with her mother and me with mine, I think for me it made our friendship make a lot more sense to me about like why we love each -- like we love each other in the same way. And it's because we had the same kind of relationships with our mothers, I believe.


 

Scottie: Mhmm. Right.


 

Miss Liz: Yeah. And just looking at Scottie, and knowing Shaila, I know that I see love and they're just a direct mirror -- they mirror each other. The hearts are so big and they're big for everybody. You know. I would expect like Shaila, maybe I thought maybe, you know, she has this position, she's this big personality, but she's -- she will see somebody in the corner of the street, I mean, I feel that.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Yes.


 

Miss Liz: I get that from this because I'm an empath, I can feel that. And Scottie, too, has a big heart just so big and just loves. So I see you guys as a reflection of each other. And and so I'm so comfortable having Sylvia as Scottie's friend because I know that she's getting that -- the real love. I know she's -- Scottie's got her back.


 

Scottie: Right. I'm about to say you know --.


 

Miss Liz: [Crosstalk] So just --.


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] I got them hands, Miss Liz. [laughter] You know that I'll come through with the hands just in case.


 

Miss Liz: [Crosstalk] Yes. And you know, she come through with the words, so you've got each other --


 

Scottie: [Crosstalk] Exactly.


 

Miss Liz: [Crosstalk] I love it.


 

Scottie: I got the bite, she got the bark.


 

Miss Liz: Yes.


 

Sylvia: I got the bark. And I got the, but listen, okay baby, not today. [laughter].


 

[Music In]


 

Sylvia: All right, that's our show!


 

Scottie: Our show is a production of Pineapple Street Studios in partnership with Netflix and Strong Black Lead. Shout out to our team, our managing producer is Agerenesh Ashagre and our lead producer is Jess Jupiter. Our music is by Amanda Jones. Special thanks to Max Linsky and Jenna Weiss-Berman.


 

Sylvia: Make sure you share your thoughts with us on the episode using the #okaynowlisten. Follow Strong Black Lead on the socials @strongblacklead. And follow us too. I'm at @sylviaobell.


 

Scottie: And I'm @scottiebeam. And if one of y'all try me with that Poochie Naga mess, I'ma lose it. [laughter] I'm a lose it. Okay?


 

Sylvia: Can't wait to see. Until next time folks, stay blessed.


 

Scottie: Bye, guys.


 

[Music Out]